A sponsee of mine chose to go out and do what we do when we hurt and don't see the benefit of this program. It took her to a place so scary that she is now in ICU. Frail, shaking, like a wild child with eyes so scary that it saddens me. And I have not the power necessary to get her sober. That is my lesson in this.
Oh but I want too. Don't we want everyone to find the solution? To walk in the sunlight of the spirit. We have had many discussions about God and spirituality that I began to think was just too much for her. And it was. Because she made it that way.
So as she is laying there probably trying to remember all that happened, I sit here trying to find the words to say to her, you can do this, but not without help. We are all helpless. Isn't that what step 1 tells me?
So, I'll reserve the anger towards this disease today. I'll give this to a God that I don't understand but He is ok with that. I'll leave this where it is and hopefully she will get better and pickup these simple spiritual tools. A design for living that has NOT let me down, not once.
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