Yes, recovering. Not recovered. Although our book does tell us that we have recovered from a seeminly helpless state of mind and body. Body yes. Mind is in the process of recoverying. And recovering from what?
I believe in the 12 steps of alcoholics anonymous. I have read the big book, applied those principals in my life (to the best of my ability) and my life is much better. I continue to be amazed.
when I sponsor woman I try to relay to them (by the book) my experience with getting sober and LIVING sober. Working the steps. Staying as clean as possible on a daily basis through the steps. That isn’t always easy.
I am reminded often to check my motives. check my daily experiences. Am I living free from resentments? Fear? Anxiety comes and goes as does fear and resentments. but today I have an answer to life’s qualms. God. Steps and my fellows within those wall.
IF this life wasn’t a better life I wouldn’t have stuck around. For the first 3 years in this program I cried all the time. I came in w/ the loss of a marriage. One that I truly cherished. A man that I thought I couldnt’ live without. He left anyway.
I’ve come to terms with that. As well as a less than great upbringing. Children that disappoint and how I’ve let others down. Siblings that don’t want this way of life but certainly could use it(i’ve been watching). But even though we are told our problem is we think too much of ourselves, i am certainly selfish when it comes to recovery and how much i put into it. RECOVERY! without it I have no life.
And today happens to be a pretty good one.
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