Isn't that what you have taught me? Ugh to that sometimes. I 'get to' practice. Yes sir. Even when I do not want to. See today, I want to be free of resentments. Free from self centeredness. So I have to do my part, which isn't always easy. I belong to a pretty open minded AA group. That lends itself to all kinds of interesting folks. Hence the title of this post.
I came in to these rooms broken. A puddle of mess. You guys tolerated my sobs, my anger, my outbursts. My endless babling. And I need to show you the same courtesy. Right?
However, in doing so that DOES not mean it excuses bad behavior. There in lies my lesson. I have tried really hard to adhere to the spiritual principals I have been shown by the program. And when someone else gets to stay sober but still live in deceit and poor choices, I get resentful. I kept wondering why do they get to do "half measures" and I can't? Why?
WHY can't I? Because I want ALl of the promises to come true. Not just a portion. Not just a tad. All. But I can not have them if I do not live for them.
Those others that can - get what they get. Right?
Another lesson - another character defect reveled. Another growth opportunity. I don't always readily accept, but when I come around.......... I really come around.
It is by the Grace of God that I "get to see' who I really am. It's the Grace of God that lets me live another day sober. Physically and mentally. Which gives my spirit the lift it needs.
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