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Allowing the flow not to consume me!

Friday, January 20, 2012

LET GO damn it!

Yes, let go.  Let go after a relationship ends, let go of the dreams you wanted for people that can not live up to them; let go of the delusion that I can, in anyway, MAKE this stuff happen.  What a lark  AND what a realization.  I CAN'T. 
I have had a bad week.  Son in jail for another drug related offense; man and I are over, and sister is in ICU.  So, today is Friday and I am so glad.  It's been hard sitting at my desk wracked in pain and not being able to let it out.  No tears, no nothing.  And believe me  THAT is hard.
I slept horrible last night.  up and down all night and finally stayed up at 4:30am.  Did not go to the gym.  Just took time to catch up on "things".
Life isn't always fair but sober I can at least be present to participate...

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