Toxic!

Toxic:  acting as or having the effect of a poison; poisonous:

Several things come to mind.  Toxic substance, bringing harm to someone.  Toxic people, meaning to harm others.  Let’s talk about the latter.

Something’s we cannot change; like people.  Mean people, obnoxious people, and TOXIC people:

I am coming to terms with this; learning it’s not about me.  Sometimes as people lack their own security they seem to gain it through breaking others down.  Know someone like this all too well.

I have spent almost 7 years coming to terms with this person.  Many arguments, many tears, hurt, anger.  How to deal with this?  By believing what I copied.  Not jumping in to their misery (ok, I fail miserably at times).  Trying to understand them is pointless as their character changes as needed.  This person will NEVER admit any wrong doings… uh and WRONG whatsoever.  Just doesn’t have the ability.  How sad is that?  Maybe I should say he doesn’t want to act differently.  I guess if we always do what we have always done, we will always get what we always have.

If we know better, we do better.  Now let me say this; I have many faults, I am not setting myself on a higher shelf.  But trying to be on the same level as a TOXIC person never works unless we begin by believing it is not us that is the problem.

So, since we cannot change anyone else how to live with a toxic person is the key.  When I learn I will pass along.  In the meantime not engaging would be a great start.