Re-Framing

I read something today that struck close to home.  It’s called ‘reframing’.  Taking something that is painful and changing the way we view it.  Sounds simple, doesn’t it?

Try it.   I have been doing something similar but did not call it ‘reframing’ but rewriting a story.  Pick any story you have experienced.  Probably should be a sad/emotional one.  Otherwise why would we ‘rewrite’ it?  The writer of this article spoke about not dodging the pain, in fact acknowledge it… you cannot go around or it will come back.  We have to breathe it, live it, sleep with it, and take it to work, to dinner….. you got the jest, right?

There is no right or wrong way to get through a painful season…. It just is… But the idea of ‘reframing’ intrigued me.  How?  What steps do we take?   And the biggest question… how long will it take?  All answers are ambiguous.  It is a personal journey.

This is what it looks like for me, today.

Beginning with acknowledging what ‘it’ is; which can be painful in itself.

Looking at it from a different perspective will take time, but not to sit waiting.  No, action is the necessary key.  So she suggests to make a list daily of what we ARE thankful for.  Even if it is silly… write it.  As this daily action takes place slowly we begin to feel it… and the feelings are what we want to avoid, prolong or escape from (when it comes to this).  She said, act as if.. which in my circles we have been passing on for years.  Does it work?  Well if we sat around moping and crying that is what we will feel.  But somehow in putting some positive outlook on where we are at that very moment can change the process….

So:  if my list were made today it would look like this:

1.  God
2. My family
3. My grandkids
4. My sobriety
5. Certain relationships have been mended
6. A job that gives me the means to pay my bills
7. My kitties
8. My comfortable bed
9. A clear(er) head
10. Friends that stay forever
     
    Taking our mind off of ‘it’ is a process and I suppose a long one at best… but ‘it’ is not serving any purpose but causing me harm… emotionally.
     
    Totally not rhetorical.  No one else has to agree…. In the weeks ahead I may find this totally useless.  But I’m willing to try.  Word for the day:  ReFraming..