Sick of being sick

I am sick.  Sick of being sick.  Sick of hurting.  And none of this has to do with being sober.  Or does it?  Being an addict I have to be vigilant and mindful of my actions.  they take me places I don't want to go if I'm not careful.  My mouth has been very painful for over a week.  Several trips to the dentist,  now today I go to the doc.  Perhaps there is a sinus infection.  I know this:  I am a wimp when it comes to feeling bad.  And I had knee surgery on June the 7th so I feel like the entire summer has been taken up w/ feeling bad. 
They (dentist) wants to pull all my upper teeth.  Not that they are the best shape.  You can't do what I did for so long and not expect problems.  And boy right now, that's what it seems like;  problems. 
If i get a window without the pain I am glad but sit here waiting for it to return.  That is crazy!
I also know that in pain I am not capable of making good decisions.  Matter of fact I don't make many decisions at all.  except how to get beyond this.
If money was no object we wouldn't be having this conversation.  I learned that too.  I would be marching wherever to get the relief I so desire.  But that isn't the case.  So, I'm having to knock one pin down at a time, praying for the right direction (intuitive thought).  So today it's the doc.  Sinus infection can make a mess of your teeth too..............
I don't want to be high, I just want to be out of pain.  I think my dentist may wonder about that......