Dirty Well...

How many times can you drink from the same dirty well expecting it to taste better? 

When someone presents themselves one way but acts another… when the true side is exposed

are we surprised or relieved?  Is it a tragedy no to have known?  Do we just turn our heads over

and over hoping what we are experiencing is not happening?  Recently I have had the painful

experience of running right in to the arms of a narcissistic ass.  I do not say that with any

apologies.  It took months to finally say GET OUT OF HERE.    And in the meantime he

has devalued much about me; me floundering trying to right myself but never truly being

able too.   All the while thinking, ‘what  is wrong with me’  like I was imagining all that

destruction.  On the outside they look awesome.  Sweet, intelligent, good looking, smooth talker,

pulling unsuspecting people in and squeezing the life out of them/me.  Incredibly self-serving,

looking back over months of this painful  journey I see all to clearly how tormented I had

become.  How much joy he must have been getting out of this whole ride. 

This entire time suppressing how I felt after being told he is not and may never be in love… with

me.  Denying my feelings out of self-preservation but knowing deep down inside it was there. 

Wishing so many times to hear those words from him… that never came.

Listen closely to how this presented itself.  People that get caught in their web truly are

surprised to find out how deceiving they can be, all the while wondering what is wrong with

themselves. 

This sounds totally bashing to ‘those people’ but it isn’t.  What this is, is a story, nonfiction, all

the events happened… only the names (haha) have been changed.