How will I view life?

It's all in the way we look at things.  And for me, unfortunately it takes extra effort to look for the positive.  EXTRA!  I am currently on a med change.  Or addition as it may.  It doesn't seem to be making any difference as my daily life is so full of depression.  I can only pray and hope that this will begin to level out as the meds begin to do their work.  It's been 2 weeks and starting today I had to increase the dose by 25mg. 
Lots of sadness going on in the lives around me.  A friend in the program has brain cancer.  That just kills me.  He is such a good guy.  A sober guy.  And then Wham!  Really?  I made the comment that I didn't get sober to get sick.  As if I had any control over that.  He is in surgery now.   I pray for his strength and peace for his family which includes his girlfriend of a year or so who is also in this program.

Really trying to focus the maintenance and growth of my spiritual condition.  That alone could eleviate this sadness from within.  Thank God it doesn't stay 24/7 or I'd be nuts.  But I have more hours in the day that are sad, than anything else.

As I read this  morning I tried to absorb what I was reading, not just read.  More than words as the song goes. 

I have to put feelings aside when it comes to how I will act, respond.  But that is extremely hard and a learned behavior.  I will keep asking for help.

Did go to the gym early this morning.  Got in a 40 minute cardio workout and a 30 minute weights.  That always lifts my spirits!