Not Mine to Fix

Sliding into trouble.  The man child.  He got fired from the job yesterday.  Gave me a bunch of bs about why, blah blah blah.  Well then he tells me that he went back.  Then I find out that wasn't true.  I am sick.  I knew him being sober was a pipe dream.  God right now I just want to throw up.  It means more trouble then I want him out of my house.  Listen to me rant.  I am beyond consoling.  I just want and need, yes need for him to be ok.  And he isn't.  His life is so damaged that I believe he doesn't see any way out.  Perhaps he brought this on himself (being fired)  I can't read through his lies. 
I can't take another romp through the thievery (if  it comes to that). 

I am sick and want to go stick my head under the covers.  God I know you are in control.  I pray you save him from his demons which include himself. 

I am sorry to post such a pitiful rant.  Right now I am so full of sadness, grief, you name it. 

It's a beautiful Friday afternoon.  The work week is just about over.  My 4 grandkids will spend the night with me and we will swim and hang out tomorrow.  I have to move beyond my fear. 

God I offer all of my life and fears and emotions to you.  Please take away this pain and above all help me to accept the man child is not mine to fix.   Help me to love him as you do.  I pray I can continue offering him love but tough love if needed.

God you brought me through THE most difficult time of my life.  Stood me up on solid ground.  I know and believe you will do that for anyone that reaches out to you in faith.  Thank you for allowing me the gift of sobriety and a life I never dreamed possible.